Chocolate Log

Johnny Smoke, from Bushpilot Biking, had more than a little bit of reputation preceeding him thanks to two previous tours with the Herts shore's Jedi Council.

When he showed up in Whistler with his easy-rider style tache and big-assed truck-cum-giant-bass-bin, it was clear that the next few days were going to be a little different.

Turns out that the Council had destroyed themselves pretty good on the trails of the interior, and we were heading to Johnny's house to meet the victims and see who was left to ride with before they headed home.

Jedi had broken his leg, and was well spaced-out when we arrived; Stophe had broken his wrist that day too, plus a range of nasty scars, twisted this and busted thats were mixed in with the tales of bravado and mayhem. They were still in high spirits in the boozer that night, and watching the slideshow of their tour pics with their cameras plugged into the pub TV (what a top idea!) it was looking like we'd probably follow a similar route to the hospital if we hit the same trails.

Accommodation

We were more than a little concerned to find out we were kipping in Johnny's back yard that night, apparently under the stars... a bit of a step down from the luxury of our Whistler Condos. Luckily, we hadn't accounted for Johnny's ability to put up four dome tents in about the time it takes to fall to the ground, drunk.

Day 1 - Woodlot

Waking up at the crack of about ten-ish, we bolted down a brekkie from Honey's cafe in the Cove, home of The Coveman's Breakfast - try one sometime, it sets you up for a day's riding alright. We left the dead and dying and went to ride the Woodlot with the remnants of the Jedi Council.

One very long push started the day; this definitely wasn't Whistler.

I somehow flatted my 2.75 double-walled Arrow DH tyre on the push up. Luckily for me, Paul (Yoda) is the slowest person ever and he just about had his shinpads on by the time I was ready to roll.

If you've ever ridden with these guys at Herts Shore or Chicksands, you'll know that they've got a spot on attitude to riding and although they were all beaten from two weeks of riding, they were all up for giving it some, and a top day of riding was had. Everyone stepped up to ride some of the lines including some amazing trailwork - hips, doubles, massive smooth berms, and a big drop into a pit that Stu tried to 180 flip on landing...

Trails ridden:

• Goldmine
• Snakes and Ladders
• Woodlot Gold
• Blood Donor
• Giant Killer
• Hoots
• Shotgun

Barb was clearly hurting that day, but she still showed us up just bowling down few steeps while we minced about choosing our line.

Tom was shaping up for a beefy hip jump to berm at the end of the trail, a big move that I reckon he had in him, but hey, this was only day one of this tour - we had about another 8 to go.

The Jedi boys split from here, and I for one was sad to not be able to ride with them some more. Next year.

We saddled up in the fresh smelling Smoke-wagon, cranked up the iPod, and took the 4hr haul-ass into the interior and through Rancher country, Merritt, and up to Kamloops.

Day 2 - Kamloops

We were miles out there that night. No city glows, millions of stars, and just a few cows randomly stomping through our campsite at 3am with Johnny running after them.

Kamloops was a dustbowl, with the steeps causing a few spills if you happened to be a bit too close to the rooster tail thrown up by the riders in front. It's not a million miles from the trails of Redlands and Leith Hill in places, just way steeper, longer and much more remote. Not to mention the constructions that are dotted around. Our friendly National Trust rangers wouldn't take too kindly to those, whereas some of them had clearly been in place for years.

After a few introductory skinnies, we came up to the first big move of the day, an 8ft or so ladder drop:

Followed by a 10ft ladder drop...

Al stepped into the mix here, riding by far the biggest drop he's ever done. And Ian continued to stomp everything.

Followed by the spiral made famous in the Specialized ads that leads into an even larger drop that was high enough that I couldn't walk to the end for a proper look. It also bounced a little unnervingly, and the direction of the drop pointed at a tree... Tom and I got it done before the pressure built up too much and cameras were being waved about.

Ian had been flying up this point, but then sat down feeling wasted under the spiral, he wasn't in a good way and sat out the next few runs and the Rose Hill session after lunch too. Seemed like a dose of heat-exhaustion given the way we'd been riding, trussed up in armour and so on, in 30 degree heat for a few days straight.

The run carried on down from the spiral, off the big drop, down a flat-out twisty singletrack, over a hip and then eventually into a bermed skinny about 5ft up that Stu cleared with textbook style.

The adrenaline was running dry by this point, and we headed into town for some coffee and cakes in the gayest coffee house in all of Canada before heading off to Rose Hill.

Rose Hill

Rose Hill's mental. It's got some great lines down the hill, including a drop into some deep sand which is like nothing I've ever ridden before. Tom was sighting up for the roadgap, but it's a truly nutty move alright and he saw the light!

We passed the the Matt Hunter line from The Collective (big left hand hip where he slams on his SX and then goes back to pin it on his Demo 9). It's a huge dusty canyon, and it was fun to blast down, although none of us made it up the kicker on the otherside with quite the same style as these guys (3mb AVI clip).

On the way out, a random ditch caught Phil out, and he ate a mouthful of Kamloops sand to finish his day off.

A dip in the river, a hearty munch, and it was back to Johnny's parent's house for a few days to ride in the Okanagan Valley.

The Okanagan

The Okanagan valley is filled by a lake around 90kms in length, and surrounded by mountains up to 6000ft high and with a massive variety of terrain, from sweet, twisty singletrack, to jagged, rock strewn chutes or sandy chutes and desert scrub.

We had a beautiful view over the valley from the garden of Mr. and Mrs. Smoke, who seemed more than happy to have an invasion of stinking bikers in their home and drinking all of their coffee.

Day 3 - Naramata

This was the day Stu and Al schooled the rest of us in the art of riding skinnies, with log rides galore and technical plank/rock sections dotting the trail down. Al's seat-up sat-down shore technique is unorthodox, but it works.

Drugs Binge

The trail had few big stunts until we hit Bud Height - a ladder bridge starting on the ground and heading up and up, sending you over a gap and onto a huge wooden landing ramp. The run-in is down a jagged rock steep, off a reasonable drop and then you'd better not be touching the brakes until after you land.

Johnny hit it up and landed clean, a good 5ft clear of the start of the downramp. It was on!

I pushed up and gave it a trial run after getting a little bit bucked by the rocks on landing the drop.

Tom snuck in there; this wasn't a line to be waiting around for the demons to talk you out of once you'd decided to go, and he sailed it. I followed a few seconds later. A combination of the slow, pick-your-line rock steep run-in over the drop, then the pace, a slight drift towards the edge of the narrow up ramp at the top and then the bloody huge gap ... it all went a bit crazy when on landing someone injected a morphine/crack mix direct into my brain and I got the biggest buzz of my life. Utterly insane.

I was still running around on crack, and I thought that'd be it for this move, but no; Dom followed and rode it out clean and was bouncing, laughing and mumbling like a crazed drug fiend too.

Courtney rode it next, I'm not sure if she'd done it before, but she made it look pretty damned easy. She's from Parksville on the Island though, they're a different breed out there it would seem.

Surely not... yep, that was Stu was pushing up to the top. He hates gaps.

He steamed in pretty hot and just landed a little back heavy, so as the front dived, he ran out of transition and he slid out on landing - just a dusting, nothing major. Phil got his dose of Stoked(TM) too riding the drop from the rock chute clean as a whistle, before Al pinned it too (the only pic of anyone actually riding it):

• Stu's Bud Height stack (@3.5mb DivX AVI clip)
• Courtney showing how it's done. (@4mb DivX AVI clip)

It's all a bit hazy from there, but I recall Stu bailing a very high Skinny, a roadgap to a sniper tranny (no, not a killer he-she; a very small landing area if you want to ride it smooth)... and yet more drops.

Run two was a much more laid back, and atmospheric affair. Smoke from a forest fire on the US border had filled the valley and made for some cool shots on the flowing singletrack trail down to the lake.

It was Courtney's birthday too, so we had cake and everyone was happy.

Day 4 - Powers Creek

After a visit to the bike shop to stock up on unnecessary hats (Riz), we rode Builder's Only, featuring a work in progress set of tabletops and a stepup/down at the start:

And then lower down - the Jedi Fucker. Scene of Jedi's broken leg:

The rest of the trail features some amazing moves, some giant wooden berms, drops and tables - Dave the Builder knows how to build his stunts solid and flowing. But by far the highlight was Crazy Train.

If Bud Height had raised the bar, then Crazy Train knocked it off the scale.

We all took a good look at this stunt on Johnny's advice. The guy knows the level of your riding within seconds of you being on the bike, and when he says walk it first, it's probably a good idea.

It was hard enough to walk the dusty, rutted trail by the side of the wooden construction. It doesn't really show in the pics at all, but not only are the constructions big, it's damn steep too.

Ian was already at the top when I was pushing up, getting in that weird zone of trying to both psyching myself up and calm myself down for a go at it. The boy was keen to make up for the riding he'd missed since Harper, and I watched him take the first few sections cleanly, over the stepdown, on the brakes hard and up onto the big roll-in A-frame.

He went over just a fraction too quick and seemed to dive right down into the dirt. That was a big smash.

In the commotion that followed, we'd all gathered at the scene like vultures, but like some sort of Houdini he was mysteriously back up at the top and was rolling in to hit it again. No mistakes this time - he rode it and the bar was raised.

The line starts with a steep into a large wooden tabletop, loose corner into a gap stepdown. Hit the brakes quick style to control your speed up onto a massive A-Frame roll-in tower. This is narrow and high, and the downslope is incredibly steep. So, keep the brakes on, roll-in and try your best to keep the speed checked before you come off the brakes at the bottom for a step-up onto the first platform. Keep it steady now... kicker onto platform two... still with us? Keep it rolling, hit the last kicker and float the gap back to the dirt landing and there's that bloke with the brain injection of serious drugs again!

Phil had been looking stunned the whole way down the trail, so that just left Dom. He teetered on the A-frame again, and shot down the ramp seemingly with no brakes, or both wheels locked, and slammed into the upslope for the stepup with a big crack.

I was certain he'd had it this time, he'd notched up a few big offs now and was still walking. He wasn't moving either. But somehow, maybe another cat life lost, he was just stunned and sporting another crack in his Troy Lee visor for his troubles - for him Crazy Train was going to have to be cleaned next time.

Second run down was without Dom, who sat by the roadside to wait for us, with a big bag of green courtesy of our guide to keep him smiling.

Dave Diggler, the trail builder joined us from here, and Ian hopped on Dom's bike for this run, as the stack on Crazy Train had mashed his cranks up.

Not far down the trail, Ian disappeared into a hole, having failed to spot an 8ft stepdown over a gap! We agreed not to tell Dom what his bike was being put through, and better communication about the trail coming up was agreed to be useful.

Even more cool stuff followed, including some fun skinnies - one epic uphill climb on a section not more than a foot wide, with some made of metal.

Then an innocuous looking short, off-camber log ride caused Ian to bail and badly twist his knee. He could hardly stand, so Dave kindly took him out of there, and that was finally game over for Ian. :(

One man down, and we were rolling again, and Tom and Courtney blasted the shit out of a big A-frame - getting silly amounts of air time. Soon after we were hitting some massive sweeping berms:

Then, before we knew it we were back at Crazy Train for another spin. No mistakes this time, Al took the award for the most textbook landing, he didn't have the luxury of around 8" travel that us others did, but he still hadn't put his bloody seat down!

Tiredness was setting in, and when we reached the next set of big moves, there were steadily fewer takers. Al and Courtney rode a gnarly looking kicker to wallride - Al had it pwned (3mb AVI clip), Courtney giving it some stick on the Cove Mingeebollockwanker Proto as she'd blown her shock by this point.

The Three Amigos, a set of drops from a steep loose run-in, were definitely on my radar, but they were built out of the hill, giving the appearance of being far higher than they were. I played the tired card, and walked away from that and a massive ladder into a roadgap that I felt was 90% on, until Tom pointed out that Courtney, at 5'6" or so looked bloody tiny from the lip. I don't know how big it really is, but it's big, and just the fact that I was happily considering it made me realise how much my riding had progressed this trip. We all had stepped way out of our comfort zone from the very first drops on Harper, and kept doing so every single day, and that does something to you after a while.

I'll be back at the Three Amigos someday with fresher legs, stronger arms and then, who knows?

For now though, the day was done.

Day 5 - Peat Bog

I'm not sure why Peat Bog is called Peat Bog, because I didn't see much peat or much bog. What I did see was a whole bunch of twiglet shore, superb rocky singletrack and a few cheeky moves all the way down that we threw ourselves at, off, over and along.

Tom hit the move of the day - a rough rocky run-in that you have to crank through to get yourself off a drop, round a loose corner and into a wooden stepup:

This area has stacks of amazing riding, and a wide variety of terrain. Definitely worth a few days of anyone's time. Our time here was done, and it was time to cruise on back to Deep Cove for some riding on the North Shore.

Day 6 - Fromme

Non riding highlights Those incredible barbecued beef steaks Sleemans Honey Lager, lots of it The view from Mr & Mrs Smoke's garden The sound system in Johnny's van. Chilling out by the Okanagan lake Honey's Cafe Al's gentlemanly manner and all round oddness Phil's inability to order anything from a menu in under four minutes Tom's bike making it through

The first time you ride the North Shore is like trying smoking. It's nasty, painful, and it's difficult to do and look cool. But you're going to be back for more because you're HOOKED.

While Whistler flatters your riding, the Shore laughs in your face at your pathetic efforts.

It's brutal in places, and some say it lacks flow, but that's only when you can't get your head dialled into the frequency you need - one second it's a steep rockface into tight switchback, then instantly you're up onto a smooth long log ride, then a high, tricky corner or technical drop. Boom! You're back into the rocks - It's mentally tough. But you come back for more, and when you can ride it, in my opinon, the trails flow like nowhere else on earth.

There's no vehicular access up Mt. Fromme, just a long winding fireroad climb up to the seventh switchback. We took a few detours to see Digger's cliff, a 25ft dead drop, and the canyon gap where Wade Simmons snapped his leg off. Oh, and the Ridiculator. Which is ridiculous, obviously.

Naturally we all hit them up pretty much on sight and then moved on to save Johnny any more embarrasment.

From the top, we ducked into Upper OilCan via the steep roll-in.

Stu and Tom rode the first testing skinny of the descent without too much fuss, setting out their stall for the day, but for the rest of us it took a fair bit of encouragement before we stepped up and rode it. Johnny was spot on that if you miss this one out, the rest of the trail is going to crush your soul.

The trail is full of log rides, mostly not super skinny, but high in places, and often leading into super-steep plank or rock rollers; techy corners, huge root-fests, a beautiful steep switchback section and a whole bunch of stunts. After some goading from the rest of us, Al, the Gentleman Freerider was "super-stoked to ride, as a matter of fact" after clearing a skinny into a steep, mossy rock face. You can see it in his eyes:

As it was, this was the best day's riding I've ever had on the Shore. Dom took a nasty piledriver off one of the rockfaces, seemingly losing both wheels on bottoming out and hitting the deck hard. It was the straw that broke the camel's back and he took the rest of the day pretty gingerly, preferring to escape with his bones and his dignity intact.

Day 7 - Seymour

The last day, and we were missing Dom and Ian. 12 days straight of riding at or beyond our limits had definitely left the rest of us beaten.

Run 1

• CBC, TNT, Dales, Aftertaste

It was a day too far for me and I was all over the place, while Stu seemed to have transcended to a higher plane and was relishing the damp planks and technical trails of Seymour, headcamming pretty much the whole of CBC in one hit second time down.

We rode some old-skool diversions down to the valley floor, including one insane rockface into an evil rocky steep. Apparently they used to race this on rigid bikes.

Run 2

• CBC, Corkscrew, Salvation, Pingu, Pangor, Horse Lookout

Phil conquered some old demons on the second run down CBC, clearing the log over the pit of filth and the Millennium log - a wide, but high log ride that's a classic feature of the trail:

Johnny took us on a few cheeky detours to bring us out back in the Cove and all that was left after that was hearty feast and booze up at the Raven, and an impromtu avant-garde music show back at Smoke's before it really was all over.

Thanks

Massive thanks to the Bushpilot - Johnny Smoke (and family!), Barb Haley, Courtney Wittenburg, Dave Diggler and all the unnamed trailbuilders, all the guys at Cove Bikes, the Jedi Council, and Jim for the ferrying to the airport and back!

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